it’s not you … it’s me

Yesterday morning, out of the blue, I decided to take a break from Facebook. Think I needed a break from all the cuteness and motivational quotes.  Went in and deactivated my account. Easy enough! It will all be there when/if I decide to go back.

I’ve never been very active on Facebook, but I’ve had my account since 2006. I sit there and stare at my «newsfeed», and sometimes I wonder … are we all grown-ups here?! There are very few posts on my list, where one could go into any kind of discussion/communication. Admittedly, I haven’t done anything at all to improve the situation.

I look at the status box, where it says “What’s on your mind?” and think about what’s on my mind. I couldn’t post that! My list of friends is very ‘mixed’ on many levels.

So, I guess, yesterday it struck me that it must be habitual, that I click on the FB icon. Since I seem to be unable to just go in there, do whatever it is I want to do, and then leave, I decided to just deactivate. It felt liberating.

The majority of the people there have my email address or know where my blog is if they’d feel any urge to get in touch. There are so many means of communication nowadays, Facebook is just one of them and my close friends are all on my phone’s contact list.

24 Replies to “it’s not you … it’s me”

  1. Good for you. Brave. I feel much the same, but…. although I’m tired of the bad language (do my relatives really talk like that?) and the endless cat videos (sorry, just me), I belong to a writers’ group on FB whose members post really helpful links and ask for opinions and also really talk among ourselves. It’s a closed group. Most of us know each other and see each other in critique groups. So, I guess I’ll stay and just try to ignore the rest.

    1. That was MY problem too … two groups I belong to. Over the day, yesterday, I found that I missed those. They would be my reason to re-activate. We shall see … 🙂

  2. I can relate. I have a distaste/hate (no love) relationship with FB. I’ve completely nuked my account twice and stayed away for a long period on a third occasion, but still come back each time to satisfy my wife and family. I do belong to a couple of photography groups there, but I much prefer blogs instead.

    1. I’m not alone 🙂
      The blogging … that’s something I thoroughly enjoy.

      When I’m in there, I try to just scroll by all the junk, but it’s inevitable that I read anyway. So, I thought a break from all that would be good.

  3. Well, you two, I have deactivated so many times it isn’t even funny any more! I always go back to see if there are any family photos up; but really they do not post; the ones that I would like to see anyway. So I am going to deactivate as well, I think. I do not belong to any groups. The only place I feel that I belong is here on WordPress and the few very good folk I follow here.
    Thanks for the nudge.

    1. Hey Linda! 🙂
      In my case, I don’t have much family … my brother is not active at all on FB, and my nieces don’t say much either. My problem — and this will probably make me go back — is the group for my hometown. It’s very active and actually a lot of fun. People keep finding old photos of the city, scan them post them … long discussions ensue and I get reminded of so much fun stuff from old times.

      Apart from that, it feels really good 🙂

  4. I have never found FB useful and still don’t.Had it since 2007. It feels like no one really care what I write.I only follow people I met on different forums. I have never wanted to find any old school mates or anything like that. They were never my friends anyway.I’ve thought of leaving but I’m just too addicted to the games 😀 In the end,it doesn’t really matter if I’m there or not.

    1. I end up writing NOTHING there, because I keep asking myself; what kind of picture of myself is it that I want to convey here?!

      Living away from my homeland, I’ve enjoyed a group for my home town, immensely and I think I’ll end up going back.

  5. That’s the thing about Facebook – it isn’t like this and it isn’t like that. It’s like whatever group(s) you are in and who you are friends with. I imagine a group of nuclear physicists who only communicate with each other. They all met some of their counterparts at conferences at one time or another.

    They are not in an overlapping circles because they are only friends with each other – not even with relatives.

    And no one knows they are there. They are a totally anonymous group – invisible to the rest of Facebook.

    How many groups are there like this on Facebook? 😉

    1. That’s it! It all depends … I’ve told so many people to ‘just scroll … as if you were browsing a magazine’, but I don’t seem to able to do it myself.

      The groups … that’s the best feature they’ve ever added. My hometown group is important to me, and I will end up going back … with a different approach, hopefully 🙂

      There is probably an immense amount of groups on FB where people talk about things that really interest them Maybe even nuclear physicists! 😀

  6. I´m still happy with my decision that I don´t need FB, but sometimes I´m afraid that someday I will end up in a museum as the only human that never had a account. I prefer blogging.

    1. Heh … naw, they are many! 🙂 Certain professions, like for example teachers …probably easier to stay away, than having to turn down friends requests all the time. I can think of many other too..

  7. I wish I had the willpower to deactivate. Unfortunately, FB is my primary method of communication w/certain family members, so lately I’ve set alerts and tried to only go there if there’s a reason. I get so frustrated w/the constant privacy changes and newsfeed chatter… It sounds like you’ve got the right idea, even if it’s just for a mini-break!

    1. Well … Day 2 is almost over, and I’m not back yet 🙂
      There are people where FB is my main communication method too.

      The privacy is always a concern! Even though I think I’m in control … sometimes I get scared I’d missed something; there are so many settings in so many places. Such an immense amount of info they possess…

      In order for this to get even remotely meaningful, I’d have to make up lists with groups of people, but I haven’t bothered.

  8. It seems that most of us have a love/hate relationship with Facebook and some of the posts make we question what I’m still doing there. However, I use it mostly to keep in touch with family overseas, and like you, I belong to a group for my hometown which I really love being connected to and part of. I keep meaning to go through my friends list and delete those who I’m not really connected with; it will take forever, but I have started!

    1. Yes, and the problem lies with me! I want to leave, but I get sucked back in … It’s the hometown group and one more, that will make me go back. I have lots of people who aren’t active on my list, but that doesn’t matter, really …
      I remember in the 90’s when all those different instant messengers emerged. One person used MSN, another Yahoo, and yet another ICQ …and all of them seemed to refuse to use something else, so I ended up with all three. I should probably been just as stubborn as all others, and only used one

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